25 Years

My life is bigger than music. My life is built by the memories of my family, mental pictures that will never fade. My life is steered by two hands, one of knowledge and the other of faith. Both of these hands are as strong as they are weak. While reason tells me it is more likely I am a distant cousin of a monkey than a descendant of two people who lived in a garden until they bit a forbidden apple, the same logic tells me that my understanding of the world is relative. I know nothing, therefore, the things I believe but don’t understand are as real to me as the ground I walk on. I have a soul.

My life is a balance between dark and light, just like the days I walk though. I have come to realize that ignoring your desire to do things will not make those desires go away. I have morals, or boundaries, but within those limits I follow the urges that come upon me. I think sometimes people tell you not to do things, not because they think you shouldn’t, but because they know eventually you’ll realize it’s not good for you. The problem with that is there are no shortcuts. Learn through experience but never comprise your morals.

My life seems to constantly move in a forward and directed path, yet I still feel as lost as the next man. I don’t know what I want to do when I grow up, and to be completely honest, I still have not grown up. When my father was 25 my older brother had just been born. When my mom was 25 she had just had me, living on a tight budget, and finishing up grad school. While I look forward to having a child, I don’t think I’ll truly be ready for the responsibility until I see his/her face. 

I used to think I was lucky, but the older I get the less I believe in the idea of that word. The opportunities I have had, friends I have made, and women I have fallen in love with can’t be credited to luck.  A friend here in Colombia told me I have a guardian angel that watches over me. I haven’t always felt like God was listening but I always felt like my grandmother was. I wouldn’t be surprised if she grabs the wheel sometimes.

Each one of these things I have listed is stronger at its core than the music I make is, but nothing in this world can better explain all of these things at one time. My earliest memories involve singing with my family. My adolescence was spent in choirs and learning guitar. A big part of me separating myself from my parents and becoming my own person during this time was the type of music I choose to listen to, rap. My identity as a young adult has been built around the fact that I love and make music and I’m sure each stage to come will have its own relationship with music. My family, friends and spiritual connection with the world is the foundation that holds me up. The music I make is the result of the view those things have provided me.

Mike

First I wanted to be tall. Then I wanted to be popular. Later I wanted to be famous. Now I just want to be happy.